We hope to finish rather than becoming a worn-out mother!

It's obvious: being a 2.0 mother is a particularly difficult role that forces us to work diligently. For all sorts of reasons, the role of mother has become more complex over time, and I understand that most of us can, at times, feel overwhelmed. What if we managed to portray our family life, our children, and our spouse with more optimism? It seems to me that we would see life from a different angle!

I wish us to overcome our frustrations.

The author Nadine Bismuth wrote it well in her latest novel, "Un lien familial." I really want to use her words because I couldn't say it better. She writes: "Perhaps this is what growing old is: realizing that nothing is ideal, swallowing one's whims and expectations, forgetting one's needs for the benefit of others. For there is no doubt that my family is now a larger entity than me: it is a cell that overrides my desires and absorbs my entire being."

It's undeniable, parental life comes with its share of difficulties and frustrations! I wish us to be able to overcome them, or at least minimize them. In a parent's life, there are a multitude of very simple joys that we must hold onto. We just need to be able to spot them and not miss the forest for the trees. Here's a tip to try: when your motherly duties overwhelm you, turn on your phone and look at the ton of photos and videos of your children. There are a ton of these little bits of happiness in our phones! These images of our family life are only happy moments, milestones, small markers for when things are more difficult. Watching a video of your daughter singing loudly in her underwear with sunglasses on, standing on a kitchen chair and reliving that moment, it makes you smile! It helps to forgive her for the mess she made in the living room. It motivates you to start the washing machine for the second time today and vacuum before going to bed.

I wish us to overcome rigidity.

Sometimes, the line is thin between everything is going well and everything falls apart. There are days when we have an idea of what the day will look like, and in the end, circumstances (or rather the children!) decide otherwise. Having worked for several years as a primary school teacher, I understood that working with little humans means having to be ready to change plans at any time. We had planned a good pad Thai for dinner, but since they got home from school, the two oldest have been fighting, and the youngest is constantly asking to be held. Will you dare to serve them some vegetables and a peanut butter sandwich? Sometimes it's wiser to focus on what's most important. When we need a lot of energy to discipline our children and maintain order, we put less into other things.

I wish us to overcome negative social pressure.

It's a fact, our house should be clean, but it doesn't have to be Pinterest-perfect. It's a fact, our children need to be stimulated, but they don't have to take swimming, yoga, painting, hockey, and piano lessons all at once. It's a fact, our children need to eat vegetables, but they don't have to be cut into stars for us to feel like we're good mothers. Yes, we also want to be women, but our nails can remain natural. Ideally, we need to stay in shape, but we don't need to become fitness moms. I wish us to put our energy in the right place and stop scattering it among futile details. In 2019, we're going to focus on what matters most to us, declutter our schedules, and get rid of frivolous things that ultimately bring us very little.

I wish us to overcome a little of the mental load.

We talk about the mental load of mothers, and fathers are often portrayed as incapable. We criticize them for their lack of commitment and resourcefulness. What if, in 2019, we really gave them the chance to take their place in the family? What if we delegated certain things to them, without being behind them to make sure everything was done as we ourselves would have done it, according to our standards? Fathers have a different perspective on family life. They perform tasks with a certain letting go, and we should sometimes take inspiration from them. Children can also participate in family life and lighten the burden on our shoulders. I wish us to cultivate a team spirit within our family.

I wish us to overcome the "I'm at the end of my rope" phenomenon and owning it.

All mothers agree that keeping a house clean when you have children is difficult, that our floor is sometimes dirtier than it should be. We certainly all agree that arguing with a child to make them stay in bed once and for all at night is exasperating. Of course, we often need to vent and seek some solidarity from other mothers. However, don't you find that quotes from exhausted parents are a little too present on social media? Isn't it a shame to give so much space to the negative aspects of parenting? With a little effort, we could restore some luster to the image of parenting and give it back its prestige. At Les Belles Combines, in 2019, we will try to plant small seeds of positivism among mothers. We will do everything possible to help you test solutions and feel competent in your role as a mother. We will put all our energy into helping you better manage your time and empower other family members! And you'll see... together, we'll get through it!