Sharing food in the middle of the table: a habit to adopt!

Dinner at the center of the table

Dinner at the center of the table involves placing all meal components in the middle of the table and letting each child serve themselves. For example, if the meal is a shepherd's pie and a salad, both would be placed in the center of the table, with serving utensils, ready to be served onto your child's plate... or not! Indeed, the child will choose the quantity of each food to put on their plate. They could also choose not to put any at all. They will also have the option to easily serve themselves more.

How to do it:

• If your child is 2 years old or younger, you can prepare their plate for them. Children between 2 and 3 years old can try to serve themselves with help or point to what they want on their plate.
• Children over 4 years old are capable of serving themselves.
• Make sure you have serving utensils that are easy to handle.
• Be careful with very hot dishes coming out of the oven; protect the handles or wait until they are less scorching before placing them in the center of the table.
• Be careful not to comment on children's choices. The goal is to simplify the act of eating and make meals enjoyable while respecting everyone's appetite.

Advantages

• Allows adherence to the principle of division of responsibility by Ellyn Satter. This is clearly the biggest advantage! In summary, you, the parents, are responsible for choosing the foods offered to your children. You are responsible for the "what," "where," and "when": dinner is at 5:30 PM, at the kitchen table, all together, and we are eating jambalaya. The child, in turn, is responsible for the "how much." They can eat two plates or nothing at all. And we must respect that. I agree, it's not easy to do. However, these principles are essential for preserving children's ability to listen to their appetites. By letting children serve themselves, we give them full responsibility for that "how much."
  
  
• Exposes children to different foods without the obligation to put them on their plate or eat them. Some children have a lot of difficulty accepting novelty. By presenting foods in the center of the table, they get used to seeing them, and this is already a first step. By regularly offering this food and seeing others take and eat it, there is a greater chance that the child will eventually add it to their plate.

• Facilitates second servings. Since all the food is on the table, there's no need to get up for a second plate. This makes it easier for parents, who can eat more calmly, and also sets an example that we should remain seated during the meal.

• Helps teach table manners. Eating is a biological act, but also a social one. Good table manners will serve them throughout life. Eating from the center of the table allows children to develop these: "May I please have the broccoli?"

Disadvantages

• It's messy! While it's true that handling utensils full of food can be messy, it's also a wonderful motor skill exercise. Having children is messy, period.

• Can give parents the impression of losing control. In my opinion, this is not a disadvantage; it's a lesson for parents! Parents are responsible for the choice and quality of food offered to children. The quantity should be the child's choice, according to their appetite. Is it too simple a solution?