Money stress

Income, expenses, savings, credit: over the next few years, I would learn the value and the weight of those words. My first CD player, bought with my own money. My first computer, bought on credit at 15 with my parents as co-signers (hey, a new word for my vocabulary!), which I had to pay back every month at Stéréo Plus… And then what interest rates meant: that computer was going to cost me a lot more than the sticker price!

As parents, we're advised to introduce kids to money matters very early on. It starts when they're tiny: we have fun teaching them to tell coins apart. The loonie fascinates them with its golden colour, while other kids are more taken with the pictures. I remember cleaning all the coins before they played with them. I'd found an old, tarnished penny, and they were amazed by how it turned a beautiful copper colour after a soak in Coca-Cola! 

The Caisse scolaire (a Desjardins school savings program), available in many schools across the province, takes it a step further by encouraging kids to save up for a toy they really want, for example. Francophone schools in Alberta have a school program in place (in French) to talk about money starting in elementary school. Even the Quebec homework-help service Allô prof (in French) has a page dedicated to financial literacy, with interesting exercises for high school students. 

However, talking about budgets and finances can have unexpected consequences. Last year, we sold our condo and bought a house. You only have to follow the news to know that's a change that turns a family's finances upside down! Of course, amid the joy of moving into our new space, we had to explain to the kids that, for the next few years, the family would have to tighten its belt a little… Nothing dramatic, but we're more careful.

In the middle of our big move, it took us a while to realize that our oldest, a brand-new teenager, had become especially stressed about our finances. All of a sudden, he was criticizing his little sister for wanting things and not telling us when his boots had a hole in them. In short, he was going way overboard trying to help the family save!

So we sat down at the table with him (and the little one). To talk about budgets, just like my parents had done thirty years earlier! But mostly to reassure him, to tell him that the income and expense columns were balanced, otherwise we never would have chosen to buy a house. That he didn't need to worry about it, we had things well in hand. And that it was now time for him and his little sister to learn how to make their own budget with the weekly allowance they'd be getting every Thursday… Funnily enough, the requests for a chocolate bar here and a stuffed animal there have started up again since then… The worry seems to be well and truly gone. ;) 

Valérie Harvey is a sociologist specializing in the family, especially fathers' involvement, which she has studied in Quebec and Japan. She also does research on manga, which she teaches at university. She is the author of several novels, essays and children's books, mostly about Japan, inspired by her three years in Kyoto. https://nomadesse.com/ 

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